“Bones sinking like stones, all that we've fought for, homes, places we've grown, all of us are done for. And we live in a beautiful world, yeah we do, yeah we do, we live in a beautiful world...”

August 31st is coming. Lately I’ve found myself unable to think of anything else but this very day. I’ve always considered myself organized, a planner. I’ve rarely done anything whether it be school, job, etc without knowing my next move. This is why August 31st is causing me so much anxiety; it is the day everything literally changes. It is the last day of my four month internship at CityLine. It is the last day of my lease in my Oakville student house, and may be the end of my living parent free for an indefinite time. Since I will no longer have school in or be living in Oakville, it will also most likely be the end of my part time job at Bluenotes. Let’s review: no job, no internship, no place to live (parent-free). Insert panic here. I have to pack up and move home unless I can find a job in my field by then.

This brings the horrible questions like: what will I do if I don’t find a job in my field right away? Will I have to get yet another part time soul sucking, life hating retail job? How will I be able to move back under the obsessive thumb of my mother after having been free for a year? How will I ever begin to pay off the millions upon millions of dollars in debt that I owe? Annnnd here come the questions. Now you may think this is too early for me to be worrying, after all I still have about two months before this all takes place.


But lately anyone I seem to catch up with, friends, family, fellow employees, hobos on the street (ok maybe I’m exaggerating on that last one) without fail, seem to be asking me the dreaded question: “so do you think they’ll hire you after your internship” and/or “what are you going to do when you finish?” I can honestly say I never thought I’d find a question I hated more than “Are you seeing anybody new?/Do you have a boyfriend?” Which is most unfortunate, but this seems to be the new inescapable question.


For those of you that may not have heard, CityLine is facing a somewhat uncertain future now that Rogers and CTV have purchased Chum and City,the Queen St building is being split apart, which has never happened before. CityTV will be on its way out of the building. Marilyn Denis now works for conflicting companies with her Chum radio station and CityTV based television show. The future of CityLine is in the air and certainly a lot is changing. Eventually when its all said and done I’m sure there will be potential job opportunities at Rogers and CTV, but with all of that not actually taking place for quite some time and no guarantees I’m back to checking the job board praying for a miracle. Who wants to pray for me?